Resident Evil: Addiction
by Level 43
Summary: Oneshot. Welcome to Resident Evil Anonymous. This is where you go when you discover that you're addicted to Resident Evil. Warning! Contains insanity.


**Resident Evil: Addiction**

A/n: I warned you in the summary, but I'll warn you again. The story is a weird one-shot. Expect strangeness. That is all. Enjoy!

"Welcome to Resident Evil Anonymous. My name is Annie. Today we have a new member, Carla."

Carla smiled nervously at the others. She was dressed in Jill's uniform from Resident Evil.

"Hello Carla," the others chorused. There were two others sitting around. One was dressed like Carlos Oliveira and one was dressed like Alexia Ashford.

"Why don't you tell us your problem Carla?"

She nodded and took a deep breath before starting. "I'm 20 years old. I got into Resident Evil when it first came out. I've got every game in mint condition for every console it was released on. Plus another copy of the game for playing. I've beaten every game and mini game with the highest ranking and unlocked everything possible. I collect anything and everything to do with Umbrella, Resident Evil, and the characters including t-shirts, stickers, patches, toys, and whatever else I could find. I've spent my entire life savings on it. And my boyfriend left me because I kept comparing him to Chris Redfield." She couldn't help but feel utterly depressed.

"It's going to be alright Carla. Admitting that you have a problem is the first step towards fixing it. Would anyone else like to share?" Annie looked around at the others.

"I will." Carla took in his U.B.C.S. uniform and replica rifle leaning against his chair. He looked to be a perfect replica of Carlos. "I had red, green, and blue herbs around my house. I had special keys and locks made for all my doors. Even the closets and bathrooms. I used to get up an hour early just so I knew I'd have enough time to get ready. Fake zombies were set up around my house and there was a puzzle that unlocked the garage door. No one wanted to talk to me or come over. I lost all my friends."

"What steps have you taken to correct it?"

"I took down the zombies and herbs, had a master key made, and took out the puzzle. Also I have a friend now," Carlos looked pleased with himself for having a friend.

"Excellent. You're making great progress. Would anyone else like to share?"

Carla was a little confused at that. There was only one other person there.

"We would like to share." The woman dressed as Alexia spoke. "My brother and I have dedicated our lives to restoring the glory of the Ashford family. All of our research is hidden in a secret place. So many have tried to steal it and the virus."

"You're very beautiful," Carla told her.

All of a sudden Alexia's expression changed to one of anger and she spoke again but this time in Alfred's voice. "How dare you look upon her? You aren't worthy enough to breathe the same air as my sister."

It was then that Carla realized that the person dressed as Alexia was really a man. She didn't think anyone would take it that far. She couldn't blame her boyfriend for leaving her. But these people were beyond strange. She didn't think she was that messed up. Not like the rest of them.

"Alfred, she didn't mean anything by it. Remember your manners," Annie told him sternly.

The man huffed indignantly but remained silent.

"I believe it is my turn. I'm the one behind your problems and your pathetic whining. You will all be crushed by my strength." A man looking way too much like Albert Wesker spoke. His evil laugh filled the room.

Carla hadn't noticed Wesker standing there when the meeting had started. She couldn't help but wonder how they all managed to look so much like real life versions of the characters. Their costumes were perfect to the tiniest detail and they all had the perfect build and face structure. She decided to look around the rest of the room and saw a man sitting on a chair in the corner slumped over. "Um, is he alright?"

Annie followed her gaze and smiled sadly. "He insists that the characters took the herbs by either smoking or injecting them so he's going through withdrawals."

Carla didn't respond to that. What was he injecting and smoking? It's not like there was blue pot anywhere. She shook off that thought and went back to watching him unconvinced that it was withdrawals. He was just sitting there with his head down and not moving. On top of that his skin was pale and he looked like a rag doll. "I don't think that's it. He looks kind of dead."

The others shrugged it off being completely unconcerned. Even Annie was way too nonchalant. The Carlos look-alike kept eying her suspiciously like Nemesis was going to jump out any moment to kill her putting them all in danger. Carla figured that guy was probably better to be around than the rest of the fruitcakes. She had a feeling that Jean wasn't quite normal herself.

Carla got up and crept slowly toward the guy in the chair. She noticed he was wearing a S.T.A.R.S. uniform and immediately remembered the scene from Resident Evil where Jill found Forest Speyer out on the patio dead. She also remembered that he came to life sometimes too. Still she moved closer. She couldn't see the rise and fall of his chest so she cautiously reached out and put a hand to his throat to check for a pulse. She breathed a sigh of relief when she found a heartbeat. Although he still didn't move.

She shrugged and turned back to the group and took a couple steps. She got this strange feeling that something wasn't quite right so she turned around to look at the Forest impersonator to find that he wasn't sitting there anymore. A little freaked out she faced forward again and found Forest only a few inches away from her. Carla yelped and fell back onto her ass. Forest fell on top of her and started biting her neck. Disgusted she threw Forest off of her. He rolled away laughing hysterically. Annie, Carlos, and Alexia were all laughing as well. Wesker just stood there with an amused expression on his face.

"What the fuck is wrong with you people?!"

Forest stood up and took a bow in their direction. "I'm sorry Miss Valentine, but I couldn't resist. It's been such a long time since anyone's played along. Even if it was unwillingly."

Carla moved away from him and grabbed up her purse. "You guys are all sick and fucking nuts. I'm out of here."

"Wait Jill. I have something I want to show you," Wesker told her.

"No way in hell." Carla moved toward the exit.

"But I want you to see my Tyrant."

Carla was disgusted. She had a feeling he wasn't quite talking about the B.O.W. She picked up Carlos' rifle and hit Wesker twice in the chest with red paintballs. "That's how it should've happened. Prick." Before she knew it everyone was grabbing paintball guns and shooting each other. Carla looked over at Annie and realized that she had been dressed like Annette Birkin. Every character from every game showed up out of nowhere and took sides. Although Ada, Sherry, and Ashley sat on the sidelines in cheerleader uniforms. They just couldn't figure out which side they were cheering for.

Carla she realized something was seriously wrong as the fight spilled out into the street. She shut her eyes tight then opened them quickly to find that she was in her bed with her alarm clock blaring on her night stand. She shut if off a little confused. That was the most real and bizarre dream she'd ever had. Even for her Resident Evil obsessed mind. She cautiously walked through her house checking every room for anything suspicious. She opened the garage door and heard growling. A dog came into view, a Doberman zombie dog. In an instant it was on her, knocking her to the ground while its teeth closed about her throat. She didn't even have a chance to fight back. Her vision faded to black and two words showed up in red. "You Died."

A/n: I know the ending is a little weird. I'm not sure what possessed me to end it like that (might have been the red herb) but it just seemed to fit in some weird twisted way. To read is human, to review is divine. I think I need sleep.


End file.
